Family: Parent-child

Many parents are trying their level best to take care of their children. But most of time children turn against them.

The children feel, “Our parents do not like us”. The parents feel, “Our children do not understand us.”

It is not enough that we give, but the other must be able to receive what we give.

Many children are not to obtain the love and concern of the parents in the way they present it. Some time a vacuum is created between them. Either of the two has to change or rather grow higher to the level of the other.

Why the parents fail? Their way of dealings may depend on their past experience and understanding. The expressions may differ from person to person. The children must feel the depth of love the parents have for them. If they both succeed in it, many of the parent-child problems can be solved.

Holy family, Joseph, Mary and Jesus, is the best example for us. The missing child, Jesus was found in Jerusalem temple. They were so much worried about it. But they handled this problem so lovingly. How? They prayed to God to know His will, and that was accepted and executed.

So also the parents and children must spend time together to seek and accept the will of God.

Improving our lifestyles within a Catholic view point

Many of Our children come to the turning point of their lives when they reach their 10th or 12th standard. The parents are in a mixed view point and tend to adopt the requirement of the situation than to access their interest or need. It is important to make them love their professional lives so as to continue enjoying life everyday.

Wisdom is knowledge gained by experience and the most sincere contributor for a child is their parents. It is important to the parent to teach what they have learned or gained. Imparting this abundance of wealth is the greatest gift of a Parent rather than send them easily to some tuition centres while working to make that money. As long as this is within their learning it is easier but seek professional help only as an alternative even at the same time trying to morally help with the lessons taught by such tuitions. In an age when most of the Indians are literate one need to sacrifice time to involve the child to confide in.

Creating a new bond of attachment and closeness improves the child to be motivated positively. It is also not the highest marks or percentages that are important but the contribution of such sacrifices for imparting the knowledge. Any grading will indicate only the aptitude of the person to what they are evaluated but on the scale of life we find such evaluations are impossible except by the Almighty.

If we look into the lives of animals we find how such cycles are nature bound, how a young cuckoo learns to fly, how a cub is made to hunt, how a herd protects a young offspring. We must learn many such Lessons of Life to be richly cultivated into our lives as what our creations was meant for. This cycle will contribute in a long way to bring about family unity and love with the importance of sharing knowledge.

Learning a profession is also not to be taken as a benchmark for making more money, as being selfish but as contribution for the society at large. How many of us take our time out to be with our children to sacrifice and give to them what we have gained teaching a lesson of our lives maybe a failure or a success story. If many of the children are told of the struggles of the Parents/ Grandparents/relatives, it would invoke a great feeling of responsibility to wake up in their lives. On the contrary we find many parents shying away to secretly shield their failures while trying to present themselves wealthy, giving to all want of their children. Perhaps this is one of the corner stones of many failed individuals.

The older generations were lucky in this respect to gain from the elders in a joint family arrangement but now that being destroyed the child have not been exposed to sincere relationships, sacrifices and love.

I hope that we can come back to our wisdom of ages to start all over again, shun away unnecessary luxuries while trying to focus to bringing up yet another responsible generation to live, enjoy and be happy in all their lives thereby praising God always.

-Donald D'Cruz, Bethan Ville, Mundakkal west, Kollam 691001. ddonalddcruz@hotmail.com

The Body and Blood of Christ

Benedict XVI celebrated Mass on the square in front of Rome's Basilica of St. John Lateran, then presided at the Eucharistic procession to the Basilica of St. Mary Major. (22 MAY 2008, 7 p.m. today)

In his homily, the Pope said that "with the gift of Himself in the Eucharist, the Lord Jesus ... raises us up again ... and puts us on the journey with the power of this Bread of life. ... The procession of Corpus Christi teaches us that the Eucharist wants to free us from all distress and discomfort ... so that we can resume the journey with the strength God gives us in Jesus Christ".

"Without the God-with-us, the God Who is near, how can we sustain the pilgrimage of life, either individually or as a society or a family of peoples?" asked the Pope. "The Eucharist is the Sacrament of the God Who does not leave us to journey alone, but puts Himself at our side and shows us the way. Indeed, it is not enough to keep going, it is important to see where we are going! Progress is not enough if there are no criteria of reference".

Family: Time than Money

A couple of weeks ago, I met a lady who runs a shop in nearby town. She speaks good English unlike other natives of Rewari, Haryana. In our short discourse, she disclosed that she was an Engineering graduate. She gave up her job-prospects only to take care of her family.

There are many people who count very much on taking care of their families. Let me put it my own way: they are aware of their primary duty. For a person who is called to family life, the primary duty is formation of the family. It includes sharing God’s love, concern, care – more time and space for the beloved ones.

According to a recent study many parents are spending only 30 minutes a day with their children. The children are too much occupied with their school and tuitions.

One must take care of the family with more time than money. Presence of a person makes present the total person – talents, love, concern, care, generosity, spiritual values, social values, and so on. Totality of the person is made available. Therefore family members must find time to be together.

Influence / temptation

We are very often influenced by others. Our character, likings, desires, decisions, etc. are formed on the Inspirations and suggestions of others.

This can be positive or negative. The positive part of it is called influence where as the negative is temptation. One can be influenced by others’ good character. Nevertheless, when someone influences us to commit a mistake we call it a temptation.

A person may inspire (influence) you to pray. Another may inspire (tempt) to lie. All these are influences. Many speak of temptation only in relation with the 6^th Commandment. Equal importance should be given to all Commandments.

When such an influence is positive one, the influenced person may own it up. It may not be so in the case of negative one.

The one who falls into temptation may remain ignorant about the backdrop. However, one who brings about temptation is more sinful than the former.

According to the words of Jesus, it is better for those who cause temptation to be thrown into deep sea. Also Civil law speaks of persons who commit crime that they are more guilty of the offence.

Tolerance

The big we are, bigger the tolerance!

Tolerance of a person depends on his/she achievements or growth level.

Children are the least tolerant ones especially at adolescence. Parents are the most tolerant ones in family life.

The higher we grow, more tolerant we become; the lower we are, least tolerant we become.

Pentecost

Wish you all the BLESSINGS OF PENTECOST.

This is the birthday of the church.

Let the Spirit be active to make us united.

Pentecost

Christianity's most under-rated holiday

Pentecost, the season of the Holy Spirit, is otherwise known as the "birthday of the church." In theory, Pentecost should be recognized, along with Christmas and Easter, as one of the three most important holidays of the Christian Church. Here's why.

Where the term "Pentecost" comes from

Pentecost (or "the 50th day" in ancient Greek) is a holiday of Christianity commemorating the descent of the Holy Spirit upon the Apostles, fifty days after the resurrection. (In the UK, it is referred to as Whitsunday, because of the white robes traditionally worn this day by those newly baptized.)

The Christian holiday also derives from the Hebrew celebration, Shavuot, which was held 50 days after Passover and was associated with the first harvest of grain in the spring. The Jewish holiday, also referred to in the Bible as "the feast of weeks," came to be identified with the revelation on Mt. Sinai when Moses received the Ten Commandments. It may also reflect still older, pagan festivals celebrating the return of life to nature following the "death" of winter. Given the importance of Passover, the Sinai tradition and the spring harvest festivals to both Jews and early Christians, one begins to understand the significance of Pentecost.

Why is Pentecost so important for Christians?

It is connected to Christianity's central image of God as Trinity. Over many centuries Christians have come to understand God in three ways. First, as God the Creator in nature; second, as the Son, in the story of the life, death and resurrection of Jesus; and finally, as Spirit. The Spirit represents God as living and active in the world today. It signifies the fact that the Christian faith is not just about events that happened in the past, rather it concerns the present and the future. The Spirit is God's animating presence in the church, and indeed, in life itself. Hence, without its Spirit, the church is dead, and without the Spirit, all that is creative and wonderful in life itself ceases to exist.

A Mother

A mother is the truest friend we have, when trials, heavy and sudden, fall upon us; when adversity takes the place of prosperity; when friends who rejoice with us in our sunshine, desert us when troubles thicken around us, still will she cling to us, and endeavour by her kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of darkness, and cause peace to return to our hearts.

-Washington Irving (1783-1859)

Influence of Mothers

Many scholars have concluded that you cannot really understand John Wesley, the founder of the Methodist movement, unless you understand his mother Susanna Wesley. She was so instrumental in his life that she inevitably affected the movement and its direction.

Americans know that Abraham Lincoln led this nation through perhaps its time of greatest crisis; but who was it that made Abraham Lincoln the man that he was? I know what Lincoln thought. He said it was his mother.

The Joy of Success

The poet, Francis Thompson, once wrote: “Nothing comes and nothing goes, that is paid with moan; Jesus, facing imminent death, voices his feelings about pain and joy. He says sadness and pain in general will eventually be conquered by joy and happiness.

The example of a mother giving birth to a child is presented here to demonstrate how pains become lost in joys. When a mother converses with others about her baby, she doesn’t constantly discuss how painful it was to give birth. She rejoices that the child is alive and well and her attention is turned toward the future.

When we are in the midst of many projects, we often must suffer in order to bring them to completion. When the project is finished the joys of success crowd the sufferings from our minds. (John 16:20-23)